Marcus Phoenix

While Marcus Phoenix is pretty damn cool in the Gears of Wars games (the second is NOT coming to the PC – WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!! ahem…), he is DEFINITELY not anywhere near hott. His confidence in welding that chain saw gun, using meat shields, and he broodiness is definitely attractive to a lot of girls and guys, but is he or could he be boyfriend material?? I think not. First of all, there is zero eye-candy factor about him. You can’t even see his body! All you see is that hulking neck that is about the same size if not bigger than his head.

Oy vey, this is supposed to be attractive?

So now how about the personality. Marcus is a hard one to read, but his broodiness (a common issue with most hott game guys) is a complete let down. So while you’d see a bright sunny day, his war disturbed mind would see fields of dead aliens and he’ll refuse to talk about his feelings because he is MAAAAAAN!!!!  -_-  Sorry, guys, but NOT COOL.

Red Alert 3 is for boys….oy vey

Okay, I hate to be nitpicky, buuuuuuut…. I just saw the trailer for Red Alert 3 with the women and men of the game. Funny because it’s the perfect example of a lot of the gaming world. All the women are hott and beautiful and just awesome and then all the men are old and not so hott and just bleh. The only eye-candy us ladies have is Ron Yuan, seriously….that’s it?

I know a lot of you may say “Oh but ya’ll have a lot of cute/pretty/hott guys to oogle over in many other games!”  Okay, I’m going to dissect these “eye-candies” for you all. Let’s start with some Devil May Cry, shall we?

....pretty....I guess

So here is Dante from the Devil May Cry series. A lot of girls think he is soooo dreamy, but here’s the thing, he can only satisfy one aspect of a girl’s desires and that is to be pretty much ONLY eye- candy. Imagine his personality if he were a real person, he’d be a total jerk. All girls tend to be attracted to the bad boy, but in reality being with the bad boy sucks! And look at what he’s wearing!! Talk about total fashion disaster! Okay so maybe the clothing thing just depends on the girl, but for someone like me, I would think that a guy wearing this outfit in real life is probably gay. Therefore, he is undate-able. Sigh. So Dante is definitely NOT date or boyfriend material. Sorry, guys, but being just like Dante isn’t really a good thing.

Later today I will be updating this list of guys that are considered hott and let you know what I really think about that assumption.